“I am now a 39 year old woman who has been an egg donor twice to a known recipient in Australia.  I first donated my eggs when I was in my late 20’s. I was working in an IVF clinic as an embryologist in Australia where anonymous egg donation is close to non-existent.  I saw many couples desperate for a family, and I wanted to do more.  I felt I had something that could offer to help these people.  I was single, and I had no desire for children at that stage in my life, as I was career driven and wanted to travel.

I added my name to the donor registry list, and became an egg donor just as I had become an organ donor.  A clinician who knew someone that was looking for a donor and thought that we would be a good match approached me. After some discussion he put us in contact.  They wanted to know more about my family medical history as well as my personal medical history.  Due to concerns with my epilepsy and other family genetic medical history, my recipient wanted to make sure that I was definitely sure I wanted to go ahead with egg donation, as this was a very stressful time for all.

I found that the couple were loving and caring people, and felt that I could not have wished to donate to more wonderfully grateful recipients. I was more than reassured that this was what I wanted to do.  If I could make a difference in two people’s lives by giving such a small gesture as a genetic gift, I thought, this was something I wanted to do for them.  I went through many blood tests, genetic tests, tests for sexually transmitted infections, scans and counseling before I was allocated my drugs to stimulate my ovaries.  During my first cycle I did not tell my family or many friends, so I found it a very daunting and a lonely process. I had no one to speak to about my feelings of anxiety and what I was going through.  I was in a new relationship and was trying to hide injections from my partner, which proved to be much harder than I expected when I was visiting interstate.

My first cycle went as well as I could have hoped. I managed to produce all mature eggs, and enough to grow to the day 5 stage known as the blastocyst stage with one viable embryo that went on to produce a beautiful baby girl.  Following my procedures my body underwent a lot of stress. I bled heavily for 4 days, my stomach bloated out like a pregnant woman’s, and I was in pain. I cannot describe this in any other way; I felt as if my body had aged physically around 5 years from the drugs, anesthetics and stress.

My body never fully bounced back to where it was before my first stimulation cycle, but the joy I received the day my recipients sent me a picture of the birth of their baby girl, filled me with so much happiness and joy.  The warm feeling of happiness I felt the day I opened that photo and saw such a proud happy family smiling, with a small bundle in their arms, was the greatest feeling I have ever experienced in my life. Words cannot describe the feeling, and I knew from that moment that it was all worth it.

A few years passed and my recipient couple approached me to donate for a sibling.   I thought this through with a lot of care; I remembered how I felt from the first cycle, how my body did not react well during the experience, and how I had felt so isolated due to having kept the procedure a secret due to personal reasons. It had been hard.

My brother is my ‘rock’ in life, someone I can always turn to in need, he has always been there for me growing up, and I felt that no-one should be denied an opportunity to experience a sibling as amazing as my brother, so I agreed to participate in one more cycle irrespective of whether the outcome was positive or negative.   I started my drugs again, followed by an egg collection resulting in one viable embryo for transfer, and ultimately creating a beautiful son for the couple and brother for their daughter.

Unfortunately this time there were complications for myself and became very ill for a long while, leading to two weeks in hospital. Again I had not told many people, including my family, about my egg donation and due the anxiety and stress I went through alone, I soon developed post traumatic depression, which lasted nearly 12 months.  This would have to have been the hardest and loneliest 12 months of my life.

However, not once do I regret donating. When I see this beautiful family it makes me so happy to have been able to be a part of their lives, and offer them a small genetic gift that has given them so much joy. I thank them for the kindness they have shown towards me. They are truly the most amazing people I have ever met.   The advice that I give to all women now going through treatment, is to never isolate yourself, always use counselors, and to ask as many questions as necessary and above all tell family and friends, as you need a support network.  Family and friends will always be there for you, no matter how strong you think you might be, we always need a web of support to hold ourselves together”.